dear cooper

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

my dear sweet precious cooper,

it is a glorious fall day today! i am certain that we would have celebrated your 11 month birthday with a walk among all the fall color that surrounds us this time of year. i took the dogs on a walk and they loved playing in the piles of leaves. as i was walking i imagined you stomping through those piles.

we saw dr m a few weeks ago. she looked at your brother's heart to make sure it was healthy. it was, which was a relief for us all, dr m included. it was very clear that she stills feels your death very deeply and is haunted by what went wrong. your brother looks alot like you, i shouldn't be surprised by that, but for some reason i was.

your dad and i planted daffodils at your garden a few weeks ago and i cant wait to see them bloom in the spring. they make me feel so much closer to you.

i also finally finished your nursery. you have a special box that lives in our bedroom, things that i made for you, that you wore and special reminders that i wanted to keep. i am also having a dear blogging friend make a book for you, which is going to be quite spectacular. i gave alot of your clothes to an organization that helps others, especially children, so i know that they will be much appreciated. yet another example cooper, of how you continue to touch the lives of others.

when we saw dr m, i also took another box of cooper's flock birds to jen. she has told me that those birds are providing such comfort to families whose children are undergoing surgery, that families hold them close, and that they bring a much needed smile.

i am proud to be your mama, cooper.

loving and missing you always,



  1. Dear Lucinda, I am new at this computer blogging thing, and tried to email you awhile ago. I don't know if you ever received it, but I do know I am so proud of you and the wonderful woman you have become. While I only knew you back in the days of grade school( with all that hair, and your horse), it has been with such joy to realize and get to know the grown-up Lucinda, and to have a glimpse into your heart. I am so sorry that you and Jamie have had to endure all that you have! Cooper and the Bean are such lucky boys to have such wonderful parents! In the meantime, we keep praying for all to continue to go well and that Coopers brother is here before you know it. Do you think Copper looks a bit like Sam? Every time I see a picture of Copper, I think of Sam. Love and hugs to you all, Sally

  2. sally.
    yes i think that cooper looks like sam. i thought that from the day he was born. i had mom and dad bring sams baby pictures when they came to rochester and there was a striking resemblence. but he did not have those HUGE blue eyes that sam had as a baby, and still has. and i think coopers head shape is alot like my dad's, in fact, when he would get mad he would rub his head just like my dad does. it will be interesting to see what the bean looks like!