Sunday, September 27, 2009
my dear sweet precious cooper,
i loved how you slept with your arms in the air like you are in this picture. i wonder today, if you would still be sleeping this way at 10 months old. yes, today you would have turned 10 months old, so hard for me to wrap my mind around.
fall is upon us. the air is crisper, the leaves turning and the wind is blustery. fall is one of my favorite seasons and it is a welcome sight, an assuring sign that life continues.
as you and i have discussed many times, you are going to have a little brother to watch over. it has been an interesting 18 weeks so far, a constant see-saw of emotions, but i think i am learning how to handle them and am taking them as they come. we see dr m in a few weeks and she will do a fetal echo cardiogram of the bean's heart.
i want you to know, even though i know you do, that this baby will never replace you, nor will it change my love for you. you will always be my first child. it is because of what you taught me in your short life that i am able to put my fears aside, have hope, and want to be parent. cooper, you taught me how much i can love, and that is one of the greatest gifts you could have given me. the bean is very lucky to have his very own guardian watching over him.
your dad had his first tattoo appointment on friday, the one that he is getting for you. it is a work in progress, but i think that it will be a reminder to those who see it just how much he loves you. as for me, well i have to wait until your brother is born, but i too will have one in your honor. and i think your uncle luke will as well. you made such an impact on us all.
i miss you terribly, cooper, but i know that you are with me all the time.
loving you always